Merrie Haskell emerged quietly onto the Author Bio scene with a simple link to her website: http://www.merriehaskell.com. She often felt unable to compete with other bios due to her extreme lack of interesting secondary occupations, having begun a humble career as a library paraprofessional at the age of 20 and otherwise not having deviated from that course, in spite of many dull promotions and arguments about fair use in document delivery and electronic reserves settings. It was not until years later that Merrie's Author Bio exploded with quirkily presented mundanities, such as facts about Merrie's ancestry ("descendant of lumberjacks and midwives") and tallying her cat-ownership in pounds, not number of felines (47 pounds of cat, as it happens). Merrie Haskell has yet to win any awards for her Author Bios, but we feel it is merely a matter of time. Her short fiction has appeared in Asimov's, Nature, and Strange Horizons.